crash and burn

what a week. late shift, lot of hard work and immovable deadlines...do or die. i have done better this time around than ever before. my intensity level is not what it should be, but my involvement and temperament along with making the most of the time i had with the family and friends made it just about as good as it could have been.

someone once told me that i need not worry to much about the quality of my work when at a particular job site. i was fussing over some imperfections and being my meticulous self. he just went and said it. " man, its a turd. you know what? you can clean it, polish it, you can do just about anything you want to it.... but when your done its still gonna be a turd"

i really dont agree with that advice. not most of the time. i feel like someone should always make the most of what they have. but in some cases i feel like i can relate. even if your nature is to make the most of the turd. its probably a healthy perspective to at least call it what it is. i mean reality is sobering sometimes. and when your feeling down, and your doing everything you can and still its not enough, it helps to take a step back and look at it for what it is. and maybe.... just maybe, you will see that its ok that you cant do more. maybe you just cant because your doing what you can with what you have and your expectations are just unrealistic considering the circumstances.

this week was a turd. i made the most of it. i wish it was better. but its all i had to work with. in the end, i am just ecstatic to look back and see what a great week it was despite any hardships.

now im ready to crash. watching the steelers game and chillin with the missus. hoping im recuperated by the morning in time for work.